So without further ado:
Playtime:
Decorating the tree:
Xmas cookie party:
The "traditional" World Junior Hockey Championship family photo op:
Monday, December 17, 2012
Holiday preparations and festivities
Well it's a busy time of year so the post will be all about the pics.
So without further ado:
Playtime:
Decorating the tree:
Xmas cookie party:
The "traditional" World Junior Hockey Championship family photo op:
So without further ado:
Playtime:
Decorating the tree:
Xmas cookie party:
The "traditional" World Junior Hockey Championship family photo op:
Friday, December 7, 2012
6 weeks
Well obviously my intention to blog more often is not coming to fruition. I blame the photographer (Pat) as he's not been as diligent with regards to the picture taking. Anyway, I have finally got a batch of pictures so am able to do a post, yay!
We are 6 weeks in and it's hard to believe that much time has already passed. On the one hand it seems like yesterday when Pat got home on the other hand it seems like Gerad has been with us forever! He is doing really well. Much better than expected considering all the upheavals he's been through. He is a remarkably easy going and happy little guy. I think that is likely why this transition for him has been quite smooth. We really could not ask for a smoother transition frankly and consider ourselves really lucky. The smooth transition is really appreciated by these battle worn parents as Van's transition was so long and so rough. Now we feel very lucky to have 2 wonderful kids.
A little about how they are doing in general.
Van:
He will be 3 1/2 at the end of January! He is doing really well right now. Many of the early signs of ASD have faded so we are hopeful he may lose the diagnosis when we go back in February. He still has his struggles believe me, however he's made such huge strides in the last year. I really believe the move to the early learning centre has been a huge help. He is really thriving there and they are so knowledgeable and helpful. He made a lot of improvement in the areas of focus, repetitive behaviours, stimming and hyperactivity. As well the early signs of aggression that he was showing have all but faded. Yay! This was the one that worried us the most with Gerad coming but he has been AMAZING with Gerad. He is loving and gentle and really engages with him. Even if Gerad is rough with him he does not retaliate. We will often catch him stroking Gerad's face or hands. He is such a great big brother and I truly feel that bringing Gerad into our home was the best thing for our family! Van's language skills have also improved dramatically. You can really have little conversations with him now. He comes up with some funny stuff too and often has us laughing. I love his "Well that's kind of silly" comments whenever something...well...silly is/or has happening/happened. He is also quite firm on things he likes and doesn't like. For instance:
Likes:
Music (big music fan, especially of The Boss and Mumford and Sons)
Macaroni and Cheese ("It's my favourite")
Cosmic Adventures indoor playground
Mighty Machines (a kids t.v show here in Canada that profiles all the mighty machines in day to day life. Every episode is about a different machine. He particularly likes the "building a truck" and "at the airport" episodes. He will watch these bad boys over and over again)
His stuffies (he likes to sleep with different ones every night)
Curious George (never gets tired of these stories)
His brother
Dislikes:
Smiling when having his picture taken (just plain refuses. Shakes his head no when asked)
Dancing (still can't get him to dance. If you catch him dancing he'll deny it)
Things that are scary (most costumes, pumpkins for awhile before he actually became somewhat obsessed with them)
Pooping on the big toilet (although has made the transition and seems to be sticking with it. Maybe it's the promise of not 1 but 2 smarties)
On to Gerad:
As mentioned above he's a very happy and easy going little guy. Doesn't really kick up much of a fuss about anything (except going to bed but even those protestations are dying down). He's very loud about his happiness though which is a joy to watch. He has a very deep from his belly giggle and laugh when he finds stuff funny. Which is much of the time. He really gets a kick out of Van and often laughs at his antics. He follows Van everywhere and wants to be with him always. Pat tells me he is easy during the week and is pretty much a go along to get along kind of kid. He enjoys playdates and especially likes being out and about. Any kind of attention is good attention as far as he's concerned. He is a pretty good eater although you have to sometimes give him one thing at a time because he will spit out what's in his mouth if he decides he wants to move on to the next item. Yes he is still doing that lol. He'll pretty much try anything although we have had to work on him with his refusal of things we know he likes because he's waiting for the next course (yoghurt for instance). He's learning though that this strategy doesn't work. He's picked up another couple of words. He says cheese when his picture is being taken. He has also started saying mama although not sure if he knows it's me or not. He basically started copying Van when Van would say mama. He is a quirky little guy and loves making faces and strange noises. He especially gets a kick out of imitating strange faces and noises made by us. He had his doctor's check-up last week and he's gained 2 pounds since joining us! Maybe that's why my back hurts so much lol. We suspect part of that is because he was only eating once a day with his foster mom (still mostly on formula) and now he is eating like a 19 month old (today!) should. He weaned himself off the bottle within the first 2 weeks. He is above the 50th percentile in weight and at the 50th for height. He is definitely bigger than Van was at the same age and is already in size 2 clothing.
Here are some pictures.
1st Santa visit with both boys (this santa is great. He loves his job and has so much patience and love for the kids):
Pat took the boys to the Korean adoption xmas party last Saturday (I didn't go as I was...ahem...hung over...). This picture makes me laugh as this is the first real smile Van has flashed in a photo in awhile and he looks seriously crazy haha:
Fun in the bath. I love Van's expression as obviously Gerad is being too loud:
Fun at Cosmic Adventures:
We are 6 weeks in and it's hard to believe that much time has already passed. On the one hand it seems like yesterday when Pat got home on the other hand it seems like Gerad has been with us forever! He is doing really well. Much better than expected considering all the upheavals he's been through. He is a remarkably easy going and happy little guy. I think that is likely why this transition for him has been quite smooth. We really could not ask for a smoother transition frankly and consider ourselves really lucky. The smooth transition is really appreciated by these battle worn parents as Van's transition was so long and so rough. Now we feel very lucky to have 2 wonderful kids.
A little about how they are doing in general.
Van:
He will be 3 1/2 at the end of January! He is doing really well right now. Many of the early signs of ASD have faded so we are hopeful he may lose the diagnosis when we go back in February. He still has his struggles believe me, however he's made such huge strides in the last year. I really believe the move to the early learning centre has been a huge help. He is really thriving there and they are so knowledgeable and helpful. He made a lot of improvement in the areas of focus, repetitive behaviours, stimming and hyperactivity. As well the early signs of aggression that he was showing have all but faded. Yay! This was the one that worried us the most with Gerad coming but he has been AMAZING with Gerad. He is loving and gentle and really engages with him. Even if Gerad is rough with him he does not retaliate. We will often catch him stroking Gerad's face or hands. He is such a great big brother and I truly feel that bringing Gerad into our home was the best thing for our family! Van's language skills have also improved dramatically. You can really have little conversations with him now. He comes up with some funny stuff too and often has us laughing. I love his "Well that's kind of silly" comments whenever something...well...silly is/or has happening/happened. He is also quite firm on things he likes and doesn't like. For instance:
Likes:
Music (big music fan, especially of The Boss and Mumford and Sons)
Macaroni and Cheese ("It's my favourite")
Cosmic Adventures indoor playground
Mighty Machines (a kids t.v show here in Canada that profiles all the mighty machines in day to day life. Every episode is about a different machine. He particularly likes the "building a truck" and "at the airport" episodes. He will watch these bad boys over and over again)
His stuffies (he likes to sleep with different ones every night)
Curious George (never gets tired of these stories)
His brother
Dislikes:
Smiling when having his picture taken (just plain refuses. Shakes his head no when asked)
Dancing (still can't get him to dance. If you catch him dancing he'll deny it)
Things that are scary (most costumes, pumpkins for awhile before he actually became somewhat obsessed with them)
Pooping on the big toilet (although has made the transition and seems to be sticking with it. Maybe it's the promise of not 1 but 2 smarties)
On to Gerad:
As mentioned above he's a very happy and easy going little guy. Doesn't really kick up much of a fuss about anything (except going to bed but even those protestations are dying down). He's very loud about his happiness though which is a joy to watch. He has a very deep from his belly giggle and laugh when he finds stuff funny. Which is much of the time. He really gets a kick out of Van and often laughs at his antics. He follows Van everywhere and wants to be with him always. Pat tells me he is easy during the week and is pretty much a go along to get along kind of kid. He enjoys playdates and especially likes being out and about. Any kind of attention is good attention as far as he's concerned. He is a pretty good eater although you have to sometimes give him one thing at a time because he will spit out what's in his mouth if he decides he wants to move on to the next item. Yes he is still doing that lol. He'll pretty much try anything although we have had to work on him with his refusal of things we know he likes because he's waiting for the next course (yoghurt for instance). He's learning though that this strategy doesn't work. He's picked up another couple of words. He says cheese when his picture is being taken. He has also started saying mama although not sure if he knows it's me or not. He basically started copying Van when Van would say mama. He is a quirky little guy and loves making faces and strange noises. He especially gets a kick out of imitating strange faces and noises made by us. He had his doctor's check-up last week and he's gained 2 pounds since joining us! Maybe that's why my back hurts so much lol. We suspect part of that is because he was only eating once a day with his foster mom (still mostly on formula) and now he is eating like a 19 month old (today!) should. He weaned himself off the bottle within the first 2 weeks. He is above the 50th percentile in weight and at the 50th for height. He is definitely bigger than Van was at the same age and is already in size 2 clothing.
Here are some pictures.
1st Santa visit with both boys (this santa is great. He loves his job and has so much patience and love for the kids):
Pat took the boys to the Korean adoption xmas party last Saturday (I didn't go as I was...ahem...hung over...). This picture makes me laugh as this is the first real smile Van has flashed in a photo in awhile and he looks seriously crazy haha:
Fun in the bath. I love Van's expression as obviously Gerad is being too loud:
Fun at Cosmic Adventures:
Monday, November 19, 2012
Almost a month in! Really?!
Well the time sure does fly by when you have two rug rats to contend with. I had planned on updating more often but really I just can't seem to find the time. I will hopefully get better at it once all the dust settles.
Things have been pretty good and the transition is going better than expected I think. We have had to work through a few little bumps. Mainly in how we have been dealing with some of his tantrums. We have tried different strategies and feel like we are almost there. Part of the issue was his insecurity and fear so any correction, no matter how mild ended up in a huge uproar. Then he would demand Pat's attention. A couple of times we tried ignoring the tantrums but his insecure attachment just caused him to escalate to extreme levels so we have decided to just continue to gently correct behaviour then offer him immediate, calm, attention when he demands it. This has definitely helped the tantrums and we have been able to calm him down. We are trying to teach him to give us signs that he needs attention that are less dramatic than screaming and crying. It seems to be working. We'll get there slowly. We have also moved up meal times as that was another source of tantrums. It seems his foster mother free fed him throughout the day so when he wants food he wanted it 5 minutes ago and does not take kindly to having to wait. Unfortunately we are not going to be free feeding him throughout the day so this is something he is going to have to learn. Compromise was the key to this lesson so we basically feed him more often and earlier so he doesn't get as hungry. He is sleeping well although he does not like to go to sleep and will have some good crying jags at bed and nap time. We again tried different approaches but what seems to be the best is to let him get it out as he then falls asleep. This does go against adoption dogma as we are told time and again never to let newly adopted children cry but believe me we did try all other approaches and these wound him up even more (we even purchased the no cry sleep solution). Now he will cry for 5-10 minutes and fall asleep. Now that he is getting more sleep his tantrums have decreased so it is better all around. Of course I'd like to get to the point where he isn't crying when it's bed time but I think we just have to be patient as he is probably still grieving his foster mom. It is definitely true that every child is different and every family is different. Our approaches (which were very different with Van) seem to be working pretty well with Gerad.
Gerad's little personality is blossoming for sure. He is a very loving and happy boy most of the time (except and bedtimes and for diaper changes, then watch out. The boy has a set of lungs!) and we are very lucky in that regard. He loves his brother very much and seeks him out for hugs. He has picked up the English word "come" and says it to our dog while gesturing (just like daddy lol). He also has a catch all word "chee" which seems to mean "I want more food", "Hello", "Where are we going?" "There's my brother", and so on lol. He loves music and has a great time dancing or bopping while sitting on your lap. He thinks the cats and dog are grand but not sure they feel the same way yet as he is still learning to be gentle. He loves to eat...boy does he love to eat. You have to be careful that you don't introduce new food while he is eating another food or the food in his mouth will quickly be spit out to make room for the new food. He loves being out and about and will just smile and smile while taking in his surroundings. He is pretty laid back and is a dream to take shopping or to go into stores as he loves just looking around at all the things and people. Pat tells me he is great at playgroups and is pretty social. He is real people person and just loves to get attention. He's seriously the easiest child to get a smile out of and as a result taking pictures of him is a delight. The opposite of Van who purposefully will not smile lol.
Speaking of Van he has been doing amazingly well. He is over the moon to have a little brother and simply cannot stop touching him (his hair, his face, his hands). He loves to give him hugs which is handy as Gerad also loves the hugs. These boys are hugging each other constantly! There hasn't been too much sibling rivalry. Only a few times where we'll hear Van exclaim "No brother!". It's usually because Gerad is trying to take the toy he's playing with.
All in all Gerad Yihyun has fit into our home perfectly and I do not even remember what life was like before him. It's a louder, messier and happier house since his arrival!
Here are some pics:
Van got a haircut :)
Things have been pretty good and the transition is going better than expected I think. We have had to work through a few little bumps. Mainly in how we have been dealing with some of his tantrums. We have tried different strategies and feel like we are almost there. Part of the issue was his insecurity and fear so any correction, no matter how mild ended up in a huge uproar. Then he would demand Pat's attention. A couple of times we tried ignoring the tantrums but his insecure attachment just caused him to escalate to extreme levels so we have decided to just continue to gently correct behaviour then offer him immediate, calm, attention when he demands it. This has definitely helped the tantrums and we have been able to calm him down. We are trying to teach him to give us signs that he needs attention that are less dramatic than screaming and crying. It seems to be working. We'll get there slowly. We have also moved up meal times as that was another source of tantrums. It seems his foster mother free fed him throughout the day so when he wants food he wanted it 5 minutes ago and does not take kindly to having to wait. Unfortunately we are not going to be free feeding him throughout the day so this is something he is going to have to learn. Compromise was the key to this lesson so we basically feed him more often and earlier so he doesn't get as hungry. He is sleeping well although he does not like to go to sleep and will have some good crying jags at bed and nap time. We again tried different approaches but what seems to be the best is to let him get it out as he then falls asleep. This does go against adoption dogma as we are told time and again never to let newly adopted children cry but believe me we did try all other approaches and these wound him up even more (we even purchased the no cry sleep solution). Now he will cry for 5-10 minutes and fall asleep. Now that he is getting more sleep his tantrums have decreased so it is better all around. Of course I'd like to get to the point where he isn't crying when it's bed time but I think we just have to be patient as he is probably still grieving his foster mom. It is definitely true that every child is different and every family is different. Our approaches (which were very different with Van) seem to be working pretty well with Gerad.
Gerad's little personality is blossoming for sure. He is a very loving and happy boy most of the time (except and bedtimes and for diaper changes, then watch out. The boy has a set of lungs!) and we are very lucky in that regard. He loves his brother very much and seeks him out for hugs. He has picked up the English word "come" and says it to our dog while gesturing (just like daddy lol). He also has a catch all word "chee" which seems to mean "I want more food", "Hello", "Where are we going?" "There's my brother", and so on lol. He loves music and has a great time dancing or bopping while sitting on your lap. He thinks the cats and dog are grand but not sure they feel the same way yet as he is still learning to be gentle. He loves to eat...boy does he love to eat. You have to be careful that you don't introduce new food while he is eating another food or the food in his mouth will quickly be spit out to make room for the new food. He loves being out and about and will just smile and smile while taking in his surroundings. He is pretty laid back and is a dream to take shopping or to go into stores as he loves just looking around at all the things and people. Pat tells me he is great at playgroups and is pretty social. He is real people person and just loves to get attention. He's seriously the easiest child to get a smile out of and as a result taking pictures of him is a delight. The opposite of Van who purposefully will not smile lol.
Speaking of Van he has been doing amazingly well. He is over the moon to have a little brother and simply cannot stop touching him (his hair, his face, his hands). He loves to give him hugs which is handy as Gerad also loves the hugs. These boys are hugging each other constantly! There hasn't been too much sibling rivalry. Only a few times where we'll hear Van exclaim "No brother!". It's usually because Gerad is trying to take the toy he's playing with.
All in all Gerad Yihyun has fit into our home perfectly and I do not even remember what life was like before him. It's a louder, messier and happier house since his arrival!
Here are some pics:
Van got a haircut :)
Friday, November 2, 2012
Life at home - one week later
Hello all, sorry for not updating sooner but life is hectic with 2 kiddos!! Pat arrived home with Gerad last Friday. Van and I went to the airport to greet them. Van was so excited to finally see Gerad in the flesh (and see daddy again of course). It was obvious dad and second son were exhausted. Gerad was shell shocked. However he was a real trooper on the way home and didn't cry in the car seat. Luckily we live downtown so the drive was only 15 minutes. When we got home Gerad went down for a nap. We woke him up at 5:30, in time to hang out with Van's friend Hudson who came for a visit. He had a great time, laughing and giggling. He enjoyed playing with all the toys. Van and he bonded right away. It's in fact been quite amazing but more about that in a bit.
The first night was understandably rough. Because of Pat's jet lag and lack of sleep I took the first shift. Of course that was a little bit difficult for Gerad as he didn't really know me from a hole in the wall. In any event I laid with him for 5 hours. During that time he slept on and off and cried lots. Poor little guy. Pat took over in the early morning and I managed to get about 2 hours sleep. The next few days were a bit of a blur. Sunday was his most difficult day. He was finally starting to realize that this was it and that we weren't going anywhere. He cried out for his foster mother a lot and had full screaming tantrums for hours. Poor little guy. There was nothing I could do for him as he was attaching to Pat and I was a threat to his foster mom's memory. I have been fine with that and have let him come to me on his own time. We have forever to get there, I am in no rush.
By Tuesday he was starting to calm a little bit and was more easily soothed. Night times were still rough but getting better. As I am working and am not the primary attachment figure I essentially go to bed with ear plugs and Pat co-sleeps with him. It seems that his witching hours are between 2 and 5. Prime jet lag hours lol. In Korea he was sleeping through the night so we know he has done it before. We are hopeful he'll get back there with time. Actually last night was his best night. When we heard him wake up he just moaned a went right back to sleep. No crying out. He also slept until 5 before having an hour of wakefulness before sleeping again! Seems the jet lag is wearing off. He has been napping really well though. All in all we think he is transitioning quite well considering his age and the extreme shock to his world he is experiencing.
Now to Van and Gerad. Van has been simply incredible. Very gentle with Gerad. Not even lashing our when his heir gets pulled. He speaks about his little brother non-stop at daycare and is excited to get home to see him. Gerad has taken to Van as well and when we get home at the end of the day Gerad runs to him for a hug. It's really great to see! We've been trying really hard to keep Van's schedule exactly the same and I think that's helped. It's also helped that I am focusing on him and that we do things alone together as well. He is not being ignored.
Halloween was a lot of fun! Van got more out of it this year than previous years. Three really is a great age. He finally is able to anticipate things and get excited about them. We knocked on about 10 doors which was just enough for him. I let him decide when he was done. Gerad even came with us to the first few doors. He got the hang of things right away and even toddled up to a couple of doors holding out his bucket. Very cute!
Anyway, here are some pictures.
A few more in Korea:
The plane:
First meal in Canada (Toronto airport):
Arriving at the airport:
First night at home:
Halloween:
Van at the same age in the same costume....weird:
Eating the loot:
The first night was understandably rough. Because of Pat's jet lag and lack of sleep I took the first shift. Of course that was a little bit difficult for Gerad as he didn't really know me from a hole in the wall. In any event I laid with him for 5 hours. During that time he slept on and off and cried lots. Poor little guy. Pat took over in the early morning and I managed to get about 2 hours sleep. The next few days were a bit of a blur. Sunday was his most difficult day. He was finally starting to realize that this was it and that we weren't going anywhere. He cried out for his foster mother a lot and had full screaming tantrums for hours. Poor little guy. There was nothing I could do for him as he was attaching to Pat and I was a threat to his foster mom's memory. I have been fine with that and have let him come to me on his own time. We have forever to get there, I am in no rush.
By Tuesday he was starting to calm a little bit and was more easily soothed. Night times were still rough but getting better. As I am working and am not the primary attachment figure I essentially go to bed with ear plugs and Pat co-sleeps with him. It seems that his witching hours are between 2 and 5. Prime jet lag hours lol. In Korea he was sleeping through the night so we know he has done it before. We are hopeful he'll get back there with time. Actually last night was his best night. When we heard him wake up he just moaned a went right back to sleep. No crying out. He also slept until 5 before having an hour of wakefulness before sleeping again! Seems the jet lag is wearing off. He has been napping really well though. All in all we think he is transitioning quite well considering his age and the extreme shock to his world he is experiencing.
Now to Van and Gerad. Van has been simply incredible. Very gentle with Gerad. Not even lashing our when his heir gets pulled. He speaks about his little brother non-stop at daycare and is excited to get home to see him. Gerad has taken to Van as well and when we get home at the end of the day Gerad runs to him for a hug. It's really great to see! We've been trying really hard to keep Van's schedule exactly the same and I think that's helped. It's also helped that I am focusing on him and that we do things alone together as well. He is not being ignored.
Halloween was a lot of fun! Van got more out of it this year than previous years. Three really is a great age. He finally is able to anticipate things and get excited about them. We knocked on about 10 doors which was just enough for him. I let him decide when he was done. Gerad even came with us to the first few doors. He got the hang of things right away and even toddled up to a couple of doors holding out his bucket. Very cute!
Anyway, here are some pictures.
A few more in Korea:
The plane:
First meal in Canada (Toronto airport):
Arriving at the airport:
First night at home:
Halloween:
Van at the same age in the same costume....weird:
Eating the loot:
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